Malfoy-Standard Muggle Post
by Raven of the Shadows
Summary: Scorpius has to sent a letter to his friend, Albus, who is staying at the Dursley household for the week. The owls aren't permitted there, so he decides to ask his father how Muggle post works.


**Malfoy-Standard Muggle Post**

"Father?"

Draco looked up from the law book he had been reading. Standing in the door to his study was his son Scorpius, an unopened letter in his hand, looking extremely anxious. Draco couldn't help but feel worried, but he kept his expression calm. "What is it, son? Who's the letter from?"

Scorpius' brow furrowed, and he looked down at the envelope in his hand. "Who's—" Realisation then dawned on his face and he shook his head. "From no one. I wrote it. I have to send this to Al, actually."

"Ah, I see. Is your owl engaged elsewhere and you need mine, then?" he asked, not understanding the reason for Scorpius' nervousness. Draco himself hadn't been that anxious since he proposed to—

No, that couldn't be! He son was too young for that; Scorpius was _twelve_ , for Merlin's sake. Meanwhile, the boy in question shook his head. "No, Father."

"Then what is it?"

"Well, Al's visiting his great-aunt's family, and I can't send the letter by owl. They are Muggles and don't tolerate that. So—so I was wondering if you could tell me how to send it the Muggle way? It's urgent."

Draco faltered. "Surely it couldn't be so urgent that it cannot wait a few days."

"But it is!"

Draco was curious, but he respected his son's privacy, so he didn't ask about the contents on the letter. But Muggle Post... "Why don't you ask your mother?"

"I did," Scorpius said, finally leaving the doorway he had been leaning against and entering the study. He flopped down into one of the plush chairs. "She said she doesn't know. But you do, Father, don't you?"

Draco gulped. He couldn't say he didn't know something that all the Muggles did, could he? "Of course, I know, son." Then, for the effect of it, he added rather indignantly, "I'm a Malfoy!"

The young boy grinned. "Great! Then you can help me send the letter, and show me how to do that as well? So that I won't bother you next time I have to do this?"

Damn him, Draco thought. If it was just about sending the letter, he could have asked one of his juniors in the Ministry. But no, his son had to know the _how_ of everything. No wonder the Hogwarts professors called Scorpius the Hermione Granger of this generation!

He nodded and turned to his work. When Scorpius didn't leave, Draco sighed and turned to face his son. "Yes?"

"It is _urgent_. So we need to send it _now_!"

Draco left out another sigh and stood up, racking his brain and trying to figure out how in the Merlin's name the Muggle post worked. "Okay, let's do it."

He remembered someone from the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts dealing with cursed letters once. The letters had small pictures with writings on them—stamps, they called them—which worked somewhat like a letter seal.

"What do we do?" Scorpius, who was following him, asked when they reached the living room. He was literally buzzing with excitement, all his previous anxiety forgotten.

"First, we put the letter in a paper envelope."

Scorpius frowned. "I've put it in an envelope already."

"Not this one," Draco said. "It is parchment; Muggles don't use that. So, we use a paper one." He shook his wrist and his wand jumped into his hand from the holster. Waving it, he conjured an envelope made of paper and slipped the letter in it. "Now, we use a stamp."

"What's that?"

"It is like the Muggle version of the seal we use on letters."

Scorpius' expression grew worried. "But we don't have a Muggle Malfoy stamp, do we?"

"No," Draco frowned, "I don't think it works like that. But don't worry; the Malfoys have one of the biggest collections of the most exquisite, very rare, costliest stamps in the world, collected over the centuries by the women in the family." He called for the house-elf.

"Master be calling Tipsy," the elf said, bowing deeply.

"Yes. Can you get me the Malfoy stamp collection?"

"Yes, Master."

The elf vanished and returned a moment later holding several albums. He saw Scorpius' eyes widen. "How come I never knew of them?"

Draco let a small smile grace his lips. "It is generally given as a wedding present to the newest Malfoy bride by the matriarch of the family. I didn't know about it, either, until I married your mother. Shall we select a stamp, now?"

Scorpius nodded and picked up the first album, holding it almost reverently in his hands. He placed it on his lap and opened it, his eyes roaming on the pages, taking in all the centuries-old stamps pasted in there, added to the collection generation-after-generation. "This is amazing!" he breathed.

"We will use the very best," Draco told him.

"Because that's how Malfoys work, isn't it?" Scorpius asked, looking up at him. Draco nodded. "But there're so many good ones in here!"

"So pick the ones you like the most, and we will use them all." Draco regretted saying that almost immediately when he saw the gleam in Scorpius' eyes.

"Yes! I think Al will appreciate that."

In the end, they had selected two hundred thirty seven stamps in all and finally managed to put them all on the envelope so that they didn't cover each other. They wrote the address to Albus' great-aunt's house in a small, empty space which they had left uncovered. The envelope looked so colourful, it hurt Draco's eyes.

"It looks ridiculous," Draco said.

Scorpius shook his head. "It looks exquisite."

Draco sighed. "All right, then. If you say so. Let's send it, shall we?" On Scorpius' nod, Draco called Tipsy and directed her to put it in the letter-box in the nearest Muggle post office.

Scorpius then looked at him in apprehension. "It will reach Al surely, right?"

Draco wasn't too sure himself, but he couldn't tell Scorpius that. "Of course it will. And when they realise which stamps we've used, they would make sure the Potter boy receives it as soon as possible."

 **o§o**

That really did happen. The overly colourful letter caught the attention of the person-in-charge of sorting the mail; he took it to the postmaster of the post office when he realised the worth of the antique, but practically useless, stamps pasted all over it. The letter was then transported to Surrey separately because of its worth, and the Surrey postmaster took it personally to the Dursley household.

It was Dudley who opened the door. One look at the letter, and he burst into laughter. When he finally sobered up, he called Harry and Ginny to the door.

"You're Mr Albus Potter?" the postmaster asked.

"I'm his father," Harry replied, trying, but badly failing, at trying not to laugh when he caught sight of the letter.

"Well, Mr Potter, I've a letter here for your son from someone by the name Scorpius Malfoy." At this, both Harry and Ginny lost whatever tiny control they had and howled with laughter, holding onto each other for support. "Sorry," Harry told the man who was still standing at the door. "We just got lost in old memories. Why don't you come in?"

"I've got work to do," the man said. "But Mr Potter, whoever sent this letter is either filthy rich or very stupid."

Ginny wiped tears of mirth off her cheeks. "Both, Mr Postman, both!"

 **o§o**

* * *

 **Word Count:** 1240

 **Prompts used:**

From January Event: National Hobby Month

• Stamp Collecting: Write about a witch or wizard using Muggle post.

From The Ultimate Patronus Quest Challenge

• G7 — Duck: Write about Draco Malfoy

From Chocolate Frog Writing Club

• (Bronze) Google Stump — Challenge: Write about someone who is extremely anxious.


End file.
